If you’ve got a penis, you’ve probably also got a prostate. And if you’ve got a prostate, you’re in luck: there’s a whole genre of sex toys designed specifically for you! In this handy introduction to prostate stimulation, we’re going to teach you why the prostate is so wonderful, how to find it (and make it feel good!), and how to choose prostate toys that work for you.
What is the prostate, and how can I find it?
The prostate is a small, walnut-sized gland that produces many of the essential fluids in semen. It also contains some muscles that contract during orgasm, which both feels good and helps squirt fluid out of the prostate and into the urethra. The real reason the prostate is so exciting when it comes to sex, though, is that it is covered in the same type of nerve endings as the g-zone, which means it can feel amazing to touch it. Some people can even reach orgasm from prostate stimulation alone, and many people report that their orgasms are stronger and more intense when they’re engaging in prostate stimulation.
If you want to find your prostate, apply some lube to one of your fingers and slide it into your anus. Gently push your finger upwards towards your belly button in a stroking, “come hither” motion. If you don’t feel anything, try sliding your finger further into your anus, since the prostate can be located up to four inches up the rectum.
The first time you poke your prostate, it might feel like you have to pee. Don’t worry! Unless you felt like you had to pee before you started touching your prostate, that’s just your body reacting to the extra pressure on your bladder. Once you get used to the sensation, it will start to feel normal and you’ll be able to relax into the new, pleasurable sensations.
For many people, prostate stimulation can be difficult with fingers alone, because the prostate often responds best to firm, diffuse pressure. That’s where the wide world of prostate toys comes in! The biggest factors to consider when looking for a prostate toy are shape and size, material, and extra features like vibration and harness compatibility. Read on to learn how find the toy that tickles your fancy (and, of course, your prostate)!
How do I know what shape is right for me?
Prostate toys, like g-zone toys, are always curved so that they press up against the prostate when inserted. The two basic categories of shapes are: wands and prostate massagers. Wands, like the njoy Pure Wand, are generally shaped like a shallow U. They’re longer than the other types of prostate toys and require you to hold them in place. The extra length, however, allows you to us put more pressure on the prostate.
Prostate massagers like those made by Aneros are “plug ‘n play” toys – they stay in place while you stroke your penis, massaging your prostate with every contraction of your anal muscles. These toys are generally shorter in length and vary in girth. If you’re someone who enjoys butt plugs or feelings of “fullness,” search for a toy with a wider head and a smaller neck. If you enjoy the feeling of anal stretching, look for a toy with a wider neck.
Which materials are best for prostate toys?
As with all sex toys, it’s important to use body safe materials. The only 100% body safe materials are: medical-grade silicone, glass, ABS hard plastic, and stainless steel. All of these materials are non-toxic and non-porous, which means that they can be completely sterilized. This keeps you safe from bacterial infections.
Each material has its benefits and drawbacks. For example, silicone toys will degrade and get deformed if you use them with silicone lubricant, so if your favorite lube for anal play is a silicone lube, you might want to opt for another material. Stainless steel is extremely smooth, very heavy, and can be warmed up with hot water. Glass is also very smooth, making it an excellent choice for people who have trouble with insertion. ABS hard plastic is usually the most affordable body safe material, and it’s also the lightest-weight.
What other features should I look out for?
Extra features on your prostate massager can make it more exciting and more versatile! Three extra features you might want to think about are vibration, external stimulation, and harness compatibility.
Prostate stimulation doesn’t require vibration, but some people find that vibration greatly enhances the sensation! Some toys, such as the Aneros Vice and many toys produced by Rocks-Off, have a pocket for an insertable bullet vibrator. Slide the vibrator into the pocket, slide the massager into your anus, turn it on, and feel the vibes!
Some prostate massages also provide external stimulation of the prostate. For example, the “p-tab” on some Aneros toys is designed to press up against the perineum (also known as the taint). Pressure on the perineum excites the prostate from the outside, increasing your orgasmic pleasure even more!
Lastly, you might want to consider using a prostate toy instead of a traditional dildo while pegging. In order to do this, however, you have to make sure that the toy has a wide, firm base that is compatible with your harness’s hardware. The Tantus Slow Drive is an excellent example of just such a toy.
At the end of the day, the most important thing is take the time to figure out what sensations you enjoy. Once you can describe the things that really get you going, you’ll have a much easier time figuring out which prostate toy is the best one for you!