Sex + Sex Toy FAQ's
Sex + Sex Toy FAQ's
Vibrant concierges get more questions than you can imagine and many we get over and over again! We want to share these questions in hopes that they may not only answer some of your questions, but let you know that you’re not the only one wondering! That’s why we have the chat available in the bottom right corner of your screen and are available via email at firstname.lastname@example.org and phone at 720-642-VIBE(8423) whenever you need us. Ask away!
In the meantime, enjoy learning from those who have come before you.
Q. What is “body-safe”?
When we say body-safe, we mean that all the materials that our products are made out of and ingredients in lubes and cleaners are safe for the body. Sex toys aren’t regulated so unfortunately, many are made of materials that cause infection and deteriorate in the body or over time. If you want to learn more about this, you can read here.
Q. I look at products and have no idea what they do. How do I figure out how they work?
This is our most common question. We are currently working on adding a tab to every single product page called “How it Works.” This will be next to the “Product Details” and “Care and Cleaning” tabs on each page. Continue to check back as they’re added and in the meantime, ask us! We love talking about how our products work.
Q. I have no idea if I want an internal or external vibrator. Is there a way to figure it out?
Trying things out is the best way to know! If you typically masturbate by playing with the clitoris, you may be more drawn to an external vibrator; if you typically enjoy having pressure or something inside the vagina or anus, you may like an internal vibrator. A great way to find out is by trying out a toy that can offer both and then deciding which you like most. We often recommend the Fun Factory Ocean (battery operated) or the Fun Factory Amorino (rechargeable) for people who are exploring what kind of vibrator they will love.
Q. How do I tell if a toy is supposed to be inserted, or used externally?
To be honest, how you use toys is up to you! In the description of the toy on bevibrant.com, most toys will specify what part of the body they are intended for (clitoris, g-spot, prostate, etc.) but it’s really up to you how you use them! The vagina is typically a few inches deep and nothing can go past the cervix so you don’t have to worry about a toy getting lost in there. As for anal toys, make sure that whatever you use has a flared base (like the Fun Factory Bootie and Tantus Ripple Small) to stop it from entering the anus all the way (there’s no cervix to stop it in there!). If you have questions about how a toy is meant to be used, feel free to ask us, and remember, you get to decide what works and feels best for you.
Q. What’s the point of a dildo?
While many people love vibrators, some people prefer pressure or a full feeling over vibrations. Dildos can put pressure inside the body on the g-spot (nJoy Pure Wand or Laid D.1 Silicone Dildo) or prostate (Tantus Sport) which can provide different sensations and orgasms than vibrators. Dildos can also be used with harnesses to give the feeling of having penetrative sex with a partner.
Q. What do I need to know about anal toys?
Anal toys are a mystery to some and intimidating to many, but can add a lot of pleasure whether alone or with a partner. A few things that are important to know are first of all, to make sure you start small and use lots of lube! When it comes to anal play, lube is your best friend. Sliquid Sassy and Uberlube are some favorites for trying anal play. Starting small means trying out a finger or two and then easing your way into a small toy like Tantus Silk Small or Tantus Little Flirt. For someone with a prostate, Aneros Eupho Syn and Tantus Protouch are highly recommended to start with. The second thing is to make sure your toy has a flared base; this will keep your toy from fully slipping into the anus. You’ll notice that toys that are made for the anus always have a flared base like the Aneros toys and Fun Factory toys. And again, be generous with the lube!
Q. What is the best way to pick out a sex toy gift for my partner?
This can be tricky because everyone likes different things but there is always somewhere to start! If you’re surprising your partner and don’t want to ask what they’re interested in, think about what they like when you are having sex or engaging in any kind of sex play. Do they like when the clitoris is stimulated? Check out the Minna Limon. Do they like anal penetration? Look up the Tantus Perfect Plug. Do they like the penis being stroked? Grab a few Tenga Eggs. Do they like prostate play? Get them the Aneros Eupho Syn. There are toys for all of these things! One of our favorite gifts for someone who loves jewelry or would love to carry a sneaky little secret with them is the Crave Vesper. This is a beautiful necklace is also a vibrator - kind of a 2 for 1 gift!
Q. How does a cock ring work?
Cock rings (also called c-rings) are a mystery to many. C-rings can go around just the shaft of the penis or the penis and testicles, it’s completely up to you. Most people use c-rings to enhance the size of the penis by restricting blood flow, keep their erection longer, and have more intense, longer-lasting orgasms. If someone is new to c-rings, we recommend starting with it just around the penis before trying it with the testicles. A great starter c-ring is the Tantus Super-Soft C-ring. It’s super flexible and soft (hence the name) making it a little less intimidating to start with.
Q. I like to masturbate in the shower. Do you have anything that can mimic that sensation?
We have a lot of fun waterproof toys that can be taken with you into the bath or shower but when we usually talk about someone liking the feel of water for masturbation, we’re talking about clitoral stimulation. One toy that we highly recommend for clitoral stimulation in and out of the shower is the Jimmyjane Form 2. This award winning toy is designed to be used on the clitoris and has a number of different levels and patterns but can be very strong to give you the same feeling as water directly on the clitoris.
Q. What is that necklace?
The Crave Vesper is a beautiful necklace that is also a vibrator. It has a tiny button on the vibrator that turns on 3 levels of vibration and 1 pattern. It is rechargeable and we highly recommend it as a fun, new, piece of jewelry (with an added wink), and a powerful vibe for it’s size. If you’re a traveler, this is a great one to take on the go!
Q. I travel a lot for work and thought it would be fun to leave something for my boyfriend while I’m gone. I saw you have some penis toys but which do you recommend?
Yes! We suggest the Tenga Eggs. These are disposable after 2 or 3 uses and are sleeves that add a little something to masturbating a penis. Just add a little lube to the inside and stroke away. The patterns on the Egg packaging is the texture on the inside of the Egg, and you can buy them in a 6-pack. The fun part about these is when you’re not traveling, you can use them together ;)
Q. Do you carry any toys that looks like a real penis?
Our two best options for things that look like a real penis are the Tantus Uncut #2 and Tantus Realdoe. The Uncut #2 is an “uncircumcised” dildo that can be used with or without a harness. The Realdoe is a double-sided dildo. One end can fit in the vagina and be help in place by the PC (kegel) muscles while being used on a partner, or can be used as a handle to use the other end on yourself or a partner.
Q. Do you carry any toys that feel like real sex?
A great option for simulating sex are the Fun Factory Pulsators. Pulsators are a great alternative to traditional vibrators. Instead of buzzing, they create a back and forth movement that stimulates sex.
Q. I’m worried about my vibrator turning on in my suitcase or when I go through security at the airport. Is there a way to make sure this doesn’t happen?
We get this question a lot! A lot of toys have a “travel lock” that makes it impossible for a toy to turn on without you unlocking it. Some of the toys that have this are the Jimmyjane Form 2, Jimmyjane Form 8, and many of the Fun Factory vibrators.
Q. What is the difference between water-based and silicone-based lube and how do I know which I’ll like?
There are a couple of factors here. Water-based lubes are safe to use with all toys. Some people prefer them because it’s an easy cleanup but others don’t like having to reapply if they are absorbed into the skin (it is water-based, afterall). Two of our favorite water-based lubes are Sutil and Sliquid H20 (it’s vegan!). Silicone-based lube can be used with any toy except those made of silicone. Silicone lube will try to bond with your silicone toy, causing the silicone toy to deteriorate and ruin the material of the toy. Lots of people prefer silicone lube because it tends to last longer but others find that it’s harder to clean. Our favorite silicone lube is Uberlube; it’s super smooth, lasts a long time, and never gets sticky.
Q. What is different about anal lube?
Anal lube is typically thicker than other lubes so that it lasts longer and gives a little more cushion. This is really a matter of preference; it is perfectly okay to use any lube for anal sex or anal play (but remember, no silicon-based lube with silicone toys). Our favorite anal lubes are Sliquid Sassy and Gun Oil.
Q. What is a harness for?
Harnesses are used by anyone who wants to have penetrative sex. A person may want to wear a harness like the Spareparts Bella, Theo, or Joque with a dildo if they don’t have a penis that is able to penetrate their partner’s vagina or anus. If someone has mobility issues, they may want to use a thigh harness like the Sportsheets Thigh Harness to be able to penetrate their partner. There is even a harness for people with penises, the Spareparts Deuce, that allows for double penetration, penetration between erections, or penetration if someone is unable to sustain an erection. A great place to start if you’re new to harnesses is the Tantus Bend-Over Beginner Harness that comes with 2 different sized dildos allowing you to work up to the Bend-Over Intermediate Harness or just use a larger dildo.
Q. I’m worried that if I try something, I might prefer it to my partner or they might prefer it to me.
You’re not the only one with this concern. The thing is, nothing can replace human connection. While toys are fun and exciting and can bring something new, they aren’t human touch, or emotion, or laughter, or romantic, or anything else that comes with a partner. If you do find something you love, you can always add it to play with your partner, as well, so it doesn’t have to be a toy or a partner, it can be both! There are some fun couples toys to try like the Dame Eva, We-Vibe 4+, or any Spareparts harness with your favorite dildo. In addition, adding the Liberator Wedge, Ramp, or Wedge/Ramp Combo can be a fun way to introduce something new with a partner that allows you to try new positions and get comfy during any kind of sex play.
Q. What is a butt plug and how is it different from other anal toys?
Butt plugs are often used to give a feeling of fullness that some people like. For someone with a vagina, they might use a butt plug for double penetration and for someone with a penis, a butt plug can press on the prostate. The Tantus Perfect Plug is a great place to start if you’re interested in trying out a butt plug. Some people choose to leave butt plugs in for longer periods of time, not just when they’re masturbating or having sex, to give a pleasurable feeling throughout the day or while engaging in other activities.
Q. What the heck is a strapless strap-on?
The Fun Factory Share, Tantus Realdoe, and Tantus Feeldoe are all examples of strapless strap-ons. A strapless strap-on typically has one end that can be inserted into the vagina and help in place by the kegel (PC) muscles, giving the wearer the ability to use the other end to penetrate a partner without having to hold the toy in place. Fun Factory also make the Sharevibe which is a vibrating strapless strap-on.
Q. Where is the g-spot and how do I target it?
The g-spot is a spot inside the vagina, typically a few inches in, on the front wall, where if it receives pressure, can feel pleasurable. Some people can easily feel an extra sensation when their g-spot is stimulated and some can’t; either way is completely normal. Using a g-spot toy like the We-Vibe Nova or Intro 6 by JimmyJane can help determine if you like the feel of pressure on the g-spot or not.